Book Review

Book Review: Everything’s Eventual

 Everything’s Eventual by Stephen King should have been called “half of this book is so boring, it’s eventual that you’ll put it away without finishing it.”  Because, alas, that’s what happened.
The book started off just fine. It’s a collection of 14 horror tales, which Stephen King describes as a collection of stories he’s gathered from various writerly experiments to keep his skills fresh. (This isn’t a new book, by the way; I just took it out of the library because it was one of the few King tomes I haven’t read.)  Some of the stories are well-crafted; the one that won the O.Henry  Award is a standout tale as an old man reminisces about meeting the Devil in the Maine woods as a lad, an eerie tale well told.  Another excellent tale is one of a man who is awake, thinking, yet paralyzed. He realizes he’s in the morgue listening to the doctors and technicians prep his autopsy. It’s chilling and well told.  I’m not terribly squeamish but I could barely get through it without squirming.

The rest…let me just say: yawn.  There’s a guy who collects random dirty limericks and quotes from bathroom stalls. He plans to commit suicide.  Okay, why? Not sure. Not sure I care. Sadly, that’s one of the weakest tales in the book.

There are a few other memorable tales, but this book is not on part with King’s other short story collections, I’m not a huge King fan nor am I a short story fan, but I do enjoy some of King’s novels.  The Stand and Duma Key are two of my favorites, along with Black House (which also got me into reading Peter Straub’s books for a while.)  But this is not one of his stronger works.

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Speaking of horror writers, did you know that Dean Koontz has a new horror book coming out in December, and it’s not one of his Frankenstein or Odd Thomas novels? It’s called Innocence, and it will be available, according to the author’s website, on December 10, 2013. I think you can pre-order it on Amazon. I plan to order it!

Another book I plan to pre-order is called Melt.  And here’s why I want a copy: macaroni and cheese. Oh yeah, and it’s written by a former colleague, Stephenie Stiavetti.  Melt, The Art of Macaroni and Cheese, will be published in October.  Given the mouth-watering image on the cover, I’d say it is worth preordering if you’re a nut about macaroni and cheese, like me!

I couldn’t end the day without mentioning the slightly disturbing fact that none other than Tardar Sauce, aka Grumpy Cat, is now a best selling author. How the world’s grumpiest cat beat me to the best seller list — and she barely a year old! — is beyond me, but there you have it, folks.  Congratulations, Tard, and especially congrats to your human family who love you, took your dictation for the book, and clean your litter box daily.

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